What is the I Message technique?

An “I” message or “I” statement is a style of communication that focuses on the feelings or beliefs of the speaker rather than thoughts and characteristics that the speaker attributes to the listener.

What is an Imessage statement?

In interpersonal communication, an I-message or I-statement is an assertion about the feelings, beliefs, values, etc. They are also used to take ownership for one’s feelings rather than implying that they are caused by another person.

What is an I message in parenting?

In a parent-child interaction, an “I” message is a style of communication that focuses on the parent’s feelings rather than accusing the child, which is called a “you” message. It is a way of expressing your own needs and feelings in a respectful way that doesn’t shame or blame the child.

How do I-Messages improve communication?

An effective “I” message will place the responsibility and focus on the communicator instead of the message’s recipient. Since you are less likely to alienate the other person, you are much more likely to have a favorable outcome that leads to better understanding and positive change.

What is an I message example?

An I-message states the behaviour and describes the speaker’s feelings (numbers 1 and 2 above). The speaker owns their feelings without coming across as judging the person. For example, you might say, ‘I feel angry when I am expecting a ride home and am forgotten.

Do I statements work?

The research asserts that a higher use of “I” statements can signify higher levels of depression and lower status levels. Pennebaker and his team analyzed transcripts and found depressed people used “I” 6.5% of the time compared to 4% for non-depressed people.

What’s an example of an I message?

An I-message states the behaviour and describes the speaker’s feelings (numbers 1 and 2 above). Some other examples of I-messages are: I feel angry when people call me names. I feel hurt when no one asks what I want to do.

What are the benefits of i messages in communication?

“I” messages personalize our communication and allow adults to share their feelings with the child in a positive manner. For an undesirable behavior, “I” messages are a better way to talk to children in a positive way, rather than using negativity. For example, you see a child throwing sand.

How do you send an I message?

Some Tips for Effective “I” Messages

Keep your words, voice and facial expressions consistent with the intensity of your feelings.
Be clear and specific and only talk about what is happening in the moment, not the past.
Don’t use the words “always” and “never.” For example: “You never do what I tell you to do.”

How do you use an I statement?

Use an “I” statement when you need to let the other person know you are feeling strongly about the issue. Others often underestimate how hurt or angry or put out you are, so it’s useful to say exactly what’s going on for you – making the situation appear neither better nor worse.

What is an I message vs a you message?

You-messages suggest blame, and encourage the recipient to deny wrong-doing or to blame back. I-messages simply state a problem, without blaming someone for it. This makes it easier for the other side to help solve the problem, without having to admit that they were wrong (see also saving face).